(PG-13) Better I post here than on CL right now...

And an hour after last call, I am back in the warm, loving arms of Oakland, CA.

Not sure how I did it, but I had 2 fernets and a beer and I don't feel anything other than the requisite tired that I would normally feel around this time. Drove home just fine, with the usual amount of jimmy-rage-- yay, btw, for useless California "drivers".
Dumb assholes, all of you.

So yes, has my liver regained her once-proud tolerance and tradition? Only time will tell, I suppose. Time and either expensive, night-out-in-the-city drinks or Bud Lights for about 50¢ apiece if you use your Safeway Club Card.

And yes, i could've put links to both bud and safeway, but i'm tired. it's past 3am.

Pretty nice selection at the zoo tonight. The Russian one I had in mind wasn't there, but fortunately, the Jewish one with the nice nose was. Nice noses? yay. Getting a little bigger around the hips? Hmm, not so much so. Maybe it's drugs.

And the anti-drug catchphrase is "grand old party" not "party boy Republican Jimmy". But I'm flattered you think me the Ted Kennedy of the Republican Party, but without the nephew's rape charges or the running around the Kennedy compound in my underwear, and definitely without the campaign worker drownage.

And to make matters worse? Both the Young Turk and Crap-On-Your-Bed Girl were there tonight. We sat in the Young Turk's section, as COYB girl only had 2-seater tables in her section that weren't too close. And again, Young Turk's uniform wasn't buttoned up all the way. Despite having a nicely accessible and unobstructed view of Turkish cleavage, the mechanics of her bra still manage to escape this Berkeley educated Civil Engineer.

Go find the berkeley and CE at berkeley links yourself.

So yes. Young Turk w/her lovely cleavage, COYB girl waiting tables right in front of ours. When the time came to say good-bye, they were again both at the bar right next to each other. Said bye to the Young Turk and her cleavage first, she's working tomorrow. Yay! COYB girl doesn't work until Thurs-dee. And I'll apparently be making trips both of those days.

Is it odd that while recapping the zoo trip, i've mentioned the girls only briefly, but have had a lot more to say about the waitresses? Not really, as w/o fail the waitresses on the whole are more attractive than the girls on the whole. If your name starts w/ a "D" and ends in an "ylan" please don't get your hippie, vegan panties in a bunch. You are the nice-smelling aberration and for this you should be happy.

So yes. Young Turk w/her lovely cleavage, COYB girl waiting tables right in front of ours. For those of you unfamiliar w/Jaime Jistory (think alliteration, you cheesedicks), COYB girl was the waitress from about a year ago with whom I went to drinks and subsequently made out w/in my truck. ("Out with whom I made in my truck" if you will...) She went AWOL shortly after this and future Hall of Famer waitress Emily (good link, also has definition of COYB girl) told me that she moved to Sacramento w/her sister. There was to be no jimmy-pursuit of COYB girl. Even though I decreed, berkeley hippie-style, "BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY" well, yeah that kinda fell through the cracks.

She returned recently anyway. Which was good because I no longer have to go through illicit channels to pursue this naive little waitress (Emily says COYB Girl didn't know what a "shaved beaver" meant) and get her to dump her BF who works at home depot and likely loads my truck w/a forklift. Goddam choadstain. WTF.

So yes, COYB leaves, leaves your beloved Tio Jaime free to pursue the Young Turk. And this is a promising lead now, as she has some connections to Alma Mater. To go with the breathtaking cleavage. No truck-making-out-age, not yet. But as she was on vacation, from which she would return to the truck-making-out-age campaign. But heh, wouldn't you know who came back when the Young Turk was out of town? Oh yes COYB girl.

Have you been scoring the game at home? That brings the count to two waitresses at the same club. Saying goodbye to them was difficult as mentioned above both tonight and a week ago. Shit.

You'd think that I would place a great value on Seniority. Which I do, but please to be understanding my newfound affinity for boobies. I'm kinda leaning towards Young Turk and her Cleavage. That and her BF lives in Turkey. As such, she's probably more apt to cheat.

I haven't considered if he works for a Home Depot in Turkey.

I realize that double-dipping in the band was a bad idea. Is double dipping with two girls at the same club who do the same thing on similar shifts a bad idea? Well probably, but it'll make for some good posts. WSK I'm not, but there'll be boobs in the post, mark my words.

Find your own eff-ing link to the Witty Sex Kitten. think blogspot.

And I'm tired now from letting this Young Turk vs. COYB Girl mull around in my head waaaay to much. But quickly,
1) Holy shit i can't emphasize enough the beauty that was the Turkish Cleavage.
2) took SixH's friend to the zoo again. He had not the foresight to avoid denim jeans, but he did exhibit the restraint to avoid dances as it would've been somewhat of a waste of money. and I'm inclined to agree wholeheartedly
3) Dammit, those boobs were nice! Eff this! I can't think of anything else right now. And I think i'm hallucinating due to fatigue as some of the text in the blogger.com POS write-a-dealie is purple, and green spots keep appearing randomly.
4) boobs. nice. yay
5) Some of the girls and floor staff are starting to recognize SixH's friend and greet him by name. Is this bad? FRANKS AND BEANS AND TURKISH CLEAVAGE!

goodnight. very tired.
Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

ps- will be providing a rating for my posts now so as to stave off intervention from the SHoP Ministry of Truth