What will you fucking idiots think of next?

I don't believe I'm posting this right now. How fucking stupid must the world around us get before i go nuts and start exercising my second amendment rights on my Bay Aryan neighbors?

Nine women to defy Vatican to become priests

And yes, I blame the bay area and the hippies and berkeley and san fran-fucking-cisco. Fuck the sixties, OK? What good came out of the sixties except for the backlash that is the modern conservative movement? Nothing. Just a bunch of hippies who still haven't grown up and who have unfortunately spawned kids stupid enough to think that their parents were cool and should be emulated.

What a fucking pukefest.

speaking of which, here's the latest infestation of the LIbEral pukefest into one of the institutions which I happen to hold dear, the Roman Catholic Church! This is so retarded I have to limit myself to the good points, and leave the sloppy seconds for you right-minded SHoPpers...

1) You know, I can drive down to San Diego right now, bring a New American Bible, rouse SixHertz the Minitrue up from his beauty sleep, have us don our Vicetivus suits, and make him swear me in as President of the United eff-ing States of America. Would that make me president? Raise your hand if you think it does.

Keep your hands up. Now everybody without their hands raised, go Thin The Herd of your self-indicating sub-par brethren and sistren. And put your fucking hand down, LMHBrent, lest you get caught up in a jihad.

For you Beauty and the Geek visitors innocently caught in this salvo of intellect, the logic is as follows: SixHertz does not have the authority to appoint me POTUS. And even if he did, I don't have the backing of the Constitution, the Electoral College-- nothing. I can go around calling myself the President all I want and play Hail to the Chief whenever I enter the office and even buy presidential looking suits and ties or even perjure myself during grand jury testimony.

Still doesn't make me the president.

Which should tell you that the headline is fucking retarded to begin with. If nothing else, that's a bit of anti-Catholic bias showing there-- one of the last remaining socially acceptable biases. So the press still considers them priests despite the Vatican's views to the contrary? Who's had almost 2000 years of priests? Who would be the authority on the definition of a priest? Who has ceremony and tradition, and really, ties back to St. Peter who was buddy-buddy with the Messiah himself?

Never mind that "some of the women are divorced, others married". You dumbfucks. The Catholic Church doesn't even allow its legitimate priests to be married. But divorced? Oh yeah, that's real Catholic right there... being divorced! Ooh that just screams "I'm a good Catholic who is accepted by my Church!" You can't even be a regular Catholic and be divorced! What parts of Catholicism don't you understand? And yet you wanna be considered a priest?

Who the fuck thinks of this shit? You fucktards gotta be kidding me...

2) Ooh, you crazy witch-nuns are being "ordained" on a river in international water so no diocese has jurisdiction over you and your illegitimate ceremony! Holy Jesus. Are you idiots seriously this fucking stupid? Do you think that you've found a loophole in our religion or something to that effect that Poof! magically grants the Grace of God on your idiot ceremony?

You have lowered the human race to new, pioneering depths of stupidity. Yes, you, the magic-priestesses standing over there on the boat. Thanks for justifying some of the anti-Catholic sentiment floating around out there with your public displays of retardation. I hope you're fucking happy with yourselves. Why don't you just wipe your asses with consecrecrated host next time? It'll have the same Catholic-morale-boosting effect you're having right now.

Dominus vobiscum, shitheads,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith