PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...
Flighty San Francisco Women, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love M---- whoa whoa whoa, hold on there...
Three Simple Words: I AM GAY
UPDATE: Retarded Craigslist Golddigger!
No problemo.
Hi! We're San Franciscans! We're tolerant of homosexuality, bestiality, necrophelia, white-bashing, man-bashing, and Catholic-bashing!
Yay for lonely and socially retarded San Franciscans!
All I Wanna Do
Hi! I have no discernable male genitalia!
uber-post
And you all wonder why Tio Jaime complains about Bay Aryan single women?
Throw these back, Mr. Sandman...
THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 11:00 PM AND 12:00 AM.
EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.
Haven't done this in a while. But I found an ad which was just too good to save for later. Figured I'd put in a bit of extra effort and find other ads which could be spearheaded by the one I found...
Beastiality - 27 (berkeley)
(rhothetaphi mirror here)
Not sure what exactly possessed me to click on this ad. Don't read too much into that, Citizen SHoPpers.
Do you Golf? - 38 (santa rosa)(rhothetaphi mirror here)
Go easy on the ellipses there, Annika................
Tired of Bowser personalities, looking for a Luigi... - 25 (financial district)
(rhothetaphi mirror here)
I woulda sent a response if she had gone into the Nintendo angle a bit more. Maybe dropped some Legend of Zelda or something... At the very least the Konami 30-lives code. No effort. But I do like the use of the word "chinky".
I want to fall in love with your words - 28(rhothetaphi mirror here)
I've always suggested things be in epistolary form, but only in jest. (Dearest Nooneh...) And while this may have worked in the 15th Century, it won't be as cool in the 21st Century via e-mail, and wholly unnecessary in the 1500th Century as specified in her ad.
By then, emissaries from the Planet Vulcan will hopefully have allowed us to impregnate their hot, Vulcan daughters so we can have a new race of mestizo, telepathic mind-melding half-humans.
BBW & herpes, does that make me obsolete... - 30
(rhothetaphi mirror here)
Why don't you Citizen SHoPpers field this one for your Tio Jaime? Somehow, I'm at a loss for words.
ISO physicists in UC Berkeley that will have laps for me - 37 (berkeley)
(rhothetaphi mirror here)
Oh please. I knew I'd run into another dumb woman looking for a physicist. I don't understand the fixation. What's so fucking inspiring about circuits and optics and rectilinear motion? What exactly is it about thermodynamics that gets these retarded housefraus wet? Are they thinking metaphysics? Because I guaran-goddam-tee you that Berkeley's Physics 7 series had nothing fruity and new age about it. It was hardcore Physics which raped you in your pooper and then his buddy Calculus came alongside shortly thereafter and would strap you down and force you to autoerotically asphyxiate yourself while masturbating.
That's probably one of the most disturbing images I've thought to publish on the SHoP. Just bear in mind that neither LMHBrent or myself were never subject to anything like that in reality, in the actual confines of LeConte Hall-- it was all figurative. Reread it just to make sure.
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith
<whorecity population="SixHertz">
You fucker. I've been posting up my blingo referral URL since your goddam birthday LAST YEAR and now you have a banner up to steal the good Citizen SHoPpers away? Fuck that! That shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.
Citizen SHoPpers, I trust you to do what is right.
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