FMK: Hermione Granger, Ginny Weasley, Fleur Delacour?

i've had this discussion w/LMHBrent before, and this chat kinda confirms that Filipinos are into wordplay. I actually have to post a legend to decipher the abbreviations we use in the chat. See how many you can figure out on your own!

Tio J

More SHoP Overlord chat (from Tues-dee 06 December 2005)

9:48 PM TioJ: you wanna 3amC the Victoria's Secret fashion show? LMHBrent: ooh TioJ: yesh 10:15 PM TioJ: GTA: SA, or harry potter, or D&M clips TioJ: ? LMHBrent: FMK? LMHBrent: j/k j/k 10:20 PM TioJ: OK... LMHBrent: wow the VS show is something on hd TioJ: holy shit TioJ: i can only imagine TioJ: OK TioJ: FMK: Hermione Granger, Ginny Weasley, Fleur Delacour? TioJ: wow that's a tough one LMHBrent: Fleur, Hermione, Ginny LMHBrent: yeah that's tough TioJ: i'd have to say fleur, ginny, hermione TioJ: and you know how much i like hermione LMHBrent: why would you k her? TioJ: if only because fleur and ginny are *even better* LMHBrent: hehe LMHBrent: wow TioJ: man... i wanna see VS in HD! LMHBrent: oh it's suhweetah LMHBrent: but i have to run back to my room to see it TioJ: go... don't let me stop you LMHBrent: ok TioJ: jax0r one for me! LMHBrent: HAHAHAHA LMHBrent: well not when seal is on LMHBrent: i can hear him in the other room TioJ: that's gross TioJ: and that's not fair that he's married to heidi klum TioJ: OK i'm gonna GTA:SA then LMHBrent: okay LMHBrent: HE IS!??? shizzle TioJ: yeah dude LMHBrent: ttyl dawg TioJ: see ya LMHBrent: lucky dawg LMHBrent: cya

3amC = 3am Criticize, 3am Criticism
GTA:SA = Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
D&M = Don and Mike
FMK = Fuck, Marry, Kill
j/k = just kidding
VS = Victoria's Secret
hd = High Definition (yeah dude, LMHB was watching the Victoria's Secret pr0n in HD!!!)
jax0r = self-abuse
heidi klum = hot SI swimsuit chick and VS porno model. No myster here, just wanted to talk about heidi klum...
ttyl = "talk to you later"
cya = "see ya"

dude we were kinda counting on you-- well, really your woman to provide the non-stripper females

In hindsight, SixH never said why his dad couldn't come to the bachelor party.

Cool sidebars: check out the ACLU quote, as well as the article about the Vatican... you want some old SHoP posts? that might take a while...

---

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

Don't you dumb-holes have anything better to be doing?
Don't you dumb-holes have anything better to be doing?, Part II
Don't you dumb-holes have anything better to be doing?, Part III

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 9:00 PM AND 10:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

---

Well, there you go. Enjoy.

Tio Jaime

SHoP Overlord chat from Tues-dee 29 November 2005

SixH: Hey, look what I just found... SixH: "I seek the social ownership of property, the abolition of the propertied class and sole control by those who produce wealth. Communism is, of course, the goal." - Roger Baldwin, Co-Founder of the ACLU 9:15 PM TioJ: OK questions for you... TioJ: 1) have you secured passage to Vicetivus VI? SixH: 1) No. TioJ: and 2) is your dad coming to vegas for your BP? SixH: 2) No TioJ: 1) hurry the fuck up because prices are good right now TioJ: and 2) WTF, why not? SixH: For 1), there is a fare sale, however, it may not be that more than me goes. SixH: Tell me the times you arrive/leave. SixH: I shall purchase a ticket now. TioJ: ? SixH: FOR VEGAS TioJ: "may not be that more than me goes?" TioJ: and we're flying in Thursday early afternoon SixH: By that, I mean, I'm the only one going. No non-sausages. 9:20 PM SixH: sorry, that was munged up TioJ: another sausage-fest? SixH: yeah. :( As far as I know TioJ: dude we were kinda counting on you-- well, really your woman to provide the non-stripper females SixH: well, yeah. TioJ: you were saying that Shiraz's brother and buddy wanna come? SixH: Standby 9:25 PM SixH: when you leaving? TioJ: thursday 12 january? should arrive around 1400hrs SixH: no, leaving LAS TioJ: oh TioJ: standby SixH: and time 9:30 PM TioJ: ohhh noooes!!! cry me a big fucking river!!! TioJ: http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20051130/ts_nm/pope_gays_usa_dc TioJ: fucking tards TioJ: fuck you heathens then! if something like Vatican edict gets in the way of your worship, then GTFO of my fucking church SixH: ok, so sunday or monday? TioJ: oh standby 9:35 PM TioJ: should be sunday afternoon... SixH: it's MLK jr weekend. SixH: don't you have monday off? TioJ: can't confirm though SixH: ok, you kinda need to. TioJ: i should, but i think trose booked the flights for thurs-sunday SixH: so I'm not leaving early/late. TioJ: OK standby SixH: crap SixH: on SixH: a SixH: stick TioJ: should be leaving vegas late sunday morning, or early sunday afternoon TioJ: trose still @ work, but i'd put that at a 97% certainty SixH: k, well, I have shit for fare deals for sunday. 9:40 PM SixH: where are you staying? TioJ: imperial palace SixH: hehe, is that where we did the champagne buffet? TioJ: oh yessir SixH: roughly how much per night? SixH: Trying to see if Shiraz's friends would wanna come TioJ: we have flight and 3 nights for about $250 each SixH: where did you get that deal? TioJ: Trosama found it on Southwest vacations SixH: ah TioJ: good shit

go fuck yourself CALPIRG!

I realize I haven't had any run-ins with you since you bothered our lecture in Pimentel, but FUCK YOU CALPIRG!!! I'm gonna fucking leave you drunk messages on Broadway until you learn better!

Please take note Citizen SHoPpers! CALPIRG is some faggoty Leftist group which preys on the stupidity of the common Degenerocrat. Fuck 'em. They came whoring around our lectures at Berkeley, asking for money for some Leftist bullshit, and I guess they have a bunch of grownups trying to do mentally masturbating Leftist shit all around the goddam golden state.

I'm very drunk right now.

I got drunk here and then left a message at the SF calpirg office down the street because it seemed like the right thing to do.

message probably wen tsomething like: "CALPIRG, fuck you you're ruining america. go fuck yourselves, you leftist FUCKS. sixhertz dot blogspot dot com. FUCK YOU."

i hope you pigfuckers on broadway are reading this right now. Bookmark the goddam SHoP, becuase you haven't heard the last from my guerilla republican ass.

Get Bent,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

[update date="20051208" time="0039" reason="Tio Jaime's so fucking drunk right now"]

i'm sober enough to maintain a good 70 wpm

12:25 AM TioJ: HOLY FUCK I'M DRUNK TioJ: CHECK OUT THE SHOP TioJ: AND mark nicodemo.mu.nu TioJ: left him some comments SixH: I saw! SixH: hfs TioJ: you like that shit, baby? TioJ: FUCK YOU GAYS TioJ: and to think... i could've stayed home and played GTA:SA SixH: oh god, you're trashed TioJ: well, not really TioJ: i'm sober enough to maintain a good 70 wpm SixH: did you drive home? TioJ: oh fuck no TioJ: trose drove SixH: ok, good. was he drunk? TioJ: nope... TioJ: FUCK YOU LEFTIST PIGFUCKERS!!! 12:30 AM TioJ: http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20051208/ts_nm/security_plane_dc TioJ: WTF TioJ: "Passenger killed by air marshals?" TioJ: why "passenger" TioJ: why not "terrorist" TioJ: or "dumbfuck" TioJ: LOL TioJ: oh fuck me TioJ: poor bastard SixH: yeah, someone wasn't taking his qualudes. SixH: how do you spell qualudes? TioJ: you're asking the wrong SHoP Overlord, my friend SixH: kwayludes. TioJ: quaaludes? TioJ: for some reason i think there's an extra "a" in there somewhere SixH: dirty martini for me, rufee-colada for the lady. Giggity giggity. TioJ: fuck dude, how republican are we? we can't even spell these drugs correctly TioJ: WHO GIVES A FUCK, BITCHES TioJ: I'M HIGH ON JESUS TioJ: FUCK YEAH TioJ: JESUS! FUCK YEAH! TioJ: fuck man, i'm going to bed TioJ: gimme a call when you're in town, yo SixH: I'll be there tomorrow. Will do. :D TioJ: SAN JOSE! FUCK YEAH! 12:35 AM TioJ: goddamit my drunken HTML skillz never cease to amaze me SixH: you posted this convo, didn't you. :D TioJ: NOT YET MOTHERFUCKER!

[/update]

Who in the hell picks these nimrods to speak before congress?

Who the hell organizes these dog and pony shows? *Cough*Black Caucus*Cough*

Victims: Racism was factor in slow Katrina response.

Commence eyeball rolling. This is no surprise. And expect the lawsuits to come into the picture as well. Oh, please, let's pick something else besides race here. How about this: FLOODING was factor in slow Katrina response. CORRUPTION was factor in slow Katrina response. INEPT LOCAL GOVERNMENT was factor in slow Katrina response. ALIENS were a factor in slow Katrina response (illegal aliens?). Hell, blame Bush! He doesn't care! BUSH was factor in slow Katrina response!

But, no. Instead, you get some Aunt Jemima wanna-be talking about how military troops focused machine gun laser targets on her granddaughter's forehead and called out racial epithets. Fine, you pull the race card, then I'll pull out the bullshit card. She's obviously been watching a few too many James Cameron movies waiting for Jesse Jackson's Social Justice Crusade Truck® to roll in, because National Guard troops don't put laser targeting devices on their weaponry, let alone point them at civilians. Jesus, if you're going to use theatrics, get it friggin' RIGHT, will you?!

Garbage in, Garbage out.

The sad thing is that the black caucus (and most of the more influential "racial activists" in this country) maintains its power over blacks by ensuring their current state is one of abuse and abject welfare.

This is the result of social welfare. Whatever happened to the ownership society?

Behind the Scenes at the SHoP and Tio Jaime Nation

Here's a hint for any visiting trolls:

bgcolor=lightsalmon for right-leaning quotes
bgcolor=lightblue for left-leaning quotes
bgcolor=burlywood for scatological conversation
bgcolor=khaki for almost everything else

This is the convention I myself use. SixHertz himself doesn't have a convention. And for those of you who still haven't figured it out, I'm Tio Jaime-- not SixHertz. See the khaki down below? It's apolitical. Try to find it in your Little Brain to enjoy the post outside the realm of online, hyper-polarized, threatening-physical-violence-from-your-excremento-dial-up-connection politics. You'll probably even like it.

More Don and Mike goodness from your SHoP Overlords!

SixH: ok, send it on over SixH: :D TioJ: lemme export... TioJ: Phonescan Shout.mp3 TioJ: i finally fucking found the segment SixH: LOL! TioJ: OK so that in conjunction with the Dis Am De Black Dog sound? that explains two major things i've been saying for the past year SixH: the past two years. :P TioJ: past two years? SixH: yep. ;) SixH: poo comes out TioJ: maybe year and a half TioJ: yeah that was 02 august 2004 SixH: yeah;, that's more accurate. TioJ: i'm gonna listen to it again SixH: ;)

Normally, no, it's a bad practice to address your trolls directly in a post, but Holy Fucking Shit, this one isn't even entertaining by accident. At least Viking and Hilton and scott underhill and even that Chavez guy are entertaining when they visit. Those guys make you wanna post more in the hopes that they'll snipe you on your own blog. Oh yeah, you read that right...

Fried Weird? Makes me wanna turn the computer off and go play Halo. Or GTA:SA.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Thurs-dee Quizzes!

In memory of my xb0x0r which is down at my parents' house w/their new Sony 50" LCD (hooowhee!) I've taken some Halo quizzes!


You are Grif. You are known for your excellent
comebacks, and your constant annoying sarcasm.
You're always up for a good staring challenge,
or an argument over something stupid. But there
is some people, you just can't seem to
beat...and that would be Donut. You try to stay
away from him as much as possible.
(Full Name: Private Dexter Grif.)
(Armor Color: Orange.)


A Halo Quiz: Which Red vs Blue character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Which Halo character are you? The flood You are like a sheep in a herd, you follow everyone else and rarely think for yourself.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

Thanks, assholes, for passing on shitty html in your quizzes!

On Sacrifice

This great war effort must be carried through to its victorious conclusion by the indomitable will and determination of the people as one great whole.
It must not be impeded by the faint of heart.
It must not be impeded by those who put their own selfish interests above the interests of the nation.
It must not be impeded by those who pervert honest criticism into falsification of fact.
It must not be impeded by self-styled experts either in economics or military problems who know neither true figures nor geography itself.
It must not be impeded by a few bogus patriots who use the sacred freedom of the press to echo the sentiments of the propagandists in Tokyo and Berlin.
And, above all, it shall not be imperiled by the handful of noisy traitors --betrayers of America, (and) betrayers of Christianity itself -- would-be dictators who in their hearts and souls have yielded to Hitlerism and would have this Republic do likewise.
I shall use all of the executive power that I have to carry out the policy laid down. If it becomes necessary to ask for any additional legislation in order to attain our objective of preventing a spiral in the cost of living, I shall do so.

--Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Fireside Chat 21 (April 28, 1942)

It becomes clear that constant reminders for the public are a necessity, because the general public is dumb.

Envirodouchebags can go eat a turd.

What was that, chicken little? Can I trouble you for a glass of shut the hell up?

NOAA ATTRIBUTES RECENT INCREASE IN HURRICANE ACTIVITY
TO NATURALLY OCCURRING MULTI-DECADAL CLIMATE VARIABILITY

"NOAA attributes this increased activity to natural occurring cycles in tropical climate patterns near the equator. These cycles, called "the tropical multi-decadal signal," typically last several decades (20 to 30 years or even longer). As a result, the North Atlantic experiences alternating decades long (20 to 30 year periods or even longer) of above normal or below normal hurricane seasons. NOAA research shows that the tropical multi-decadal signal is causing the increased Atlantic hurricane activity since 1995, and is not related to greenhouse warming."

Boy, it sucks when you don't have evidence to support kneejerk suppositions, doesn't it.

Screw this. We'll go right ahead and say what KGO couldn't: Chicks are waxing off and lasering off their pubes.

Just watched a segment on KGO's 11 o'clock news.

Hairless Fad Could Have Consequences

Hopefully, they'll put up a video soon. It's pretty funny how the closest they come to talking about pubic hair and crotchal regions is through showing a Sex and the City clip.

The best part? When they show the Campanile. "WTF?" you'll find yourself thinking, but oh OK then they start interviewing berkeley guys and one berkeley chick. And if you didn't already realize it, berkeley chicks don't shave their legs. Nor their armpits. Yet somehow, the pubes make the cut?

My neighbor is coming home right now from watching Grey's Anatomy at a friend's (place). I wonder if my neighbor is shorn. Maybe a nice landing strip?

I'd try to sneak some right-margin pics in right about now. Yeah, right.

[update date="20051128" time="1028"]
OK a video has been up for a while. Go to the article's link above, and then click on the VIDEO link. Why does this seem like a no-brainer? That's because it is. Except your Tio Jaime didn't know it because he was trying to use Firefox this whole time.

And Firefox doesn't quite handle the pop-up. Or maybe that's just me. In any case, try several browsers. Funny video.
[/update]

so... no indian doctors or nurses, but hey indian patient with neverending boner!

Whoa. KGO-TV news is telling me that there was a earthquake an hour and a half ago. Didn't feel a single thing. I was putting laundry away.

Moving on. The best part of the episode was when they played the Greenskeepers' song "Lotion". Look it up. Find the video. Too bad they ruined the song by actually referring to Buffalo Bill and the lotion...

OH AND WHAT IS THIS SHIT? CINDY SHEEHAN CRYING? AND NOW SHE'S LAUGHING AND SMILING! WHAT A CROCK OF SHIT!

I'm gonna stop watching the news, as it just makes me mad.

all my love,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3am Criticism of Grey's Anatomy! And it doesn't suck!

You are now in chat room "GASucksPoop." TioJ has entered the chat room. TioJ (9:52:27 PM): hello dere TioJ (9:52:30 PM): oh wonderful TioJ (9:52:46 PM): i'm reading the plot for tonight's Grey's Anatomy TioJ (9:52:51 PM): i'm predicting a major suck-fest TioJ (9:53:38 PM): good thing i have D&M to tool around with TioJ (9:53:45 PM): a few minutes and we'll be underway TioJ (10:01:09 PM): here we go TioJ (10:01:10 PM): TioJ (10:01:49 PM): OK meredith having another whore moment TioJ (10:01:54 PM): ooh boyshorts TioJ (10:02:05 PM): ooh HFA TioJ (10:02:24 PM): ooh stupid dr. izzie and frat cockt0r TioJ (10:03:07 PM): ooh space needle! TioJ (10:04:00 PM): ooh sandra oh in a bra TioJ (10:04:08 PM): funny how i'm OK w/that TioJ (10:04:32 PM): oh, was dr. ellen's dude some indian guy? TioJ (10:05:13 PM): whatta fag TioJ (10:05:36 PM): george is folding his laundry while his female roommates talk to him about flaccid BF problems? TioJ (10:05:52 PM): she has big teeth TioJ (10:06:32 PM): Booger! TioJ (10:08:39 PM): "they always look so sad when i kick them out" TioJ (10:09:34 PM): and his boner won't go away TioJ (10:09:37 PM): and he was indian! TioJ (10:09:47 PM): "nobody knows where they might end up" TioJ (10:15:25 PM): priapism! TioJ (10:16:26 PM): so... no indian doctors or nurses, but hey indian patient with neverending boner! TioJ (10:17:35 PM): "are we feeling existential this morning?" TioJ (10:19:28 PM): whoa Greenskeepers! TioJ (10:19:35 PM): "Lotion" TioJ (10:19:41 PM): which is a grace song TioJ (10:20:04 PM): it puts the lotion on its skin! TioJ (10:20:06 PM): or else it gets the hose again! TioJ (10:20:13 PM): it puts the lotion on its skin! TioJ (10:20:17 PM): or else it gets the hose again TioJ (10:20:22 PM): yes precious, it gets the hose TioJ (10:20:55 PM): wow this episode doesn't suck! TioJ (10:21:23 PM): dr. izzie-whore! TioJ (10:22:17 PM): "lotion in the basket" said george TioJ (10:22:45 PM): shitty way to tie into the Greenskeepers song TioJ (10:26:06 PM): ooh dr. izzie whore TioJ (10:28:16 PM): hmm TioJ (10:28:39 PM): as much as i would like to impale ellen pompeo on my erect penis, i would not like her and HFA to stick needles into my erect penis TioJ (10:29:29 PM): hey, penis blood! TioJ (10:29:38 PM): "congratulations. you're flaccid" TioJ (10:29:47 PM): "never thought i'd be so happy to hear that." TioJ (10:37:06 PM): heh that's shitty TioJ (10:37:19 PM): she should have asked to be excused or something TioJ (10:37:20 PM): WTF TioJ (10:38:03 PM): whoa, was that an indian doctor extra? TioJ (10:40:53 PM): umm, yeah, did nobody see that dr. ellen and dr. patrick dempsey coming? TioJ (10:46:28 PM): nothing she couldn't reveal? TioJ (10:46:45 PM): what if she whips out a flaccid cock? would you wanna know that, blackt0r 2? TioJ (10:47:36 PM): Seattle! TioJ (10:49:24 PM): frat cockt0r fucked up TioJ (10:49:30 PM): and here's syphillis girl! TioJ (10:49:53 PM): i remember her being a lot hotter last year TioJ (10:51:54 PM): and she doesn't have the magenta scrubs anymore TioJ (10:56:49 PM): LOL frat cockt0r and sypillis girl caught by dr. izzie! TioJ (10:59:14 PM): hey this episode didn't suck! TioJ (10:59:34 PM): five young doct0rs responsible for five young lives! TioJ (10:59:42 PM): nothing short of a miracle! TioJ (11:00:00 PM): rosanna arquette guest stars! TioJ has left the chat room.

Credibility Check

CNN can go to hell.

Thanks for not mentioning this kind of important fact, CNN assclowns. Let's gloss all this shit over, please. Cindy Sheehan is so yesterday.

Atheists behave.

The George Washington Thanksgiving Declaration

WHEREAS, It is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor;

WHEREAS, Both the houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me "to recommend to the people of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:"

Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favorable interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquility, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed; for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enable to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted' for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and, in general, for all the great and various favors which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech Him to pardon our national and other transgressions; to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our National Government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have show kindness to us), and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as He alone knows to be best.

--George Washington - October 3, 1789

Happy Turkey Day.

And just in time for Thanksgiving Dinner, a big, steaming bowl of Degener-ocrat shit!

YUMMY!

Hope I didn't ruin your appetite. I was gonna post a picture of the scatological variety, but then realized that a healthy handful of the SHoP's hits came from my own browser. And I don't wanna look at that crap. Literally.

So instead of actual feces, the SHoP brings to you the next best thing! Degener-ocrats!

Senator says Bush needs to depoliticize Iraq debate

Holy Jesus. Again with these degenerate ignoramuses pointing out the Republican specks in our eyes while not seeing the democrud logs in theirs? What's wrong with you people? I pray to God this is some joke being orchestrated by the RNC and the VRWC. And for the last time, I want in!

The reason for this post is two-fold:

1) A big, giant, Golden Bear howdy to all those alums who have found this blog through calcafe, which is bound to be a huge waste of time, but more and more of my fellow alums have been signing up and then trying to get me to sign up. WTF. And as punishment? I will now send you all the conservative goodness which you've missed since you and I went to school together.

2) Your SHoP Overlords (and one Overlady) love pointing out when degener-ocrats have these helpful suggestions for Republicans. Does nobody outside the right-wing blogosphere see that their own advice is so much more effectively applied to their own political tactics? Sounds odd to ask it, but which party is more likely to subscribe to the the By Any Means Necessary mindset to achieve their political goals? It sure as fuck ain't mine.

all my love,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Hah, dumbasses...

French president, backed by poll, pushes for more diverse TV shows after riots

When did the French all turn into retards? No, it's not rhetorical, I really want to know.

CIA Factbook

Stumbled upon an interesting website today while taking a look at the interesting male/female birthrates of China. Then saw something worrisome...

Open two windows/tabs of your browser and take a look, side by side, at:

The US
and
China

Take a look at the "Economy" section for both.

Ugh.

Don't you dumb-holes have anything better to be doing?, Part III

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

Don't you dumb-holes have anything better to be doing?
Don't you dumb-holes have anything better to be doing?, Part II

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 2:00 PM AND 4:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

---

The best part about roman numerals in your title? Sometimes you don't even have to hit the Backspace key...

Vatican says active gays not welcome in priesthood

In order from has most right to has least right, here is the pecking order for people to voice an opinion about this.

Pope Benedict XVI
Cardinals
Bishops
[update time="1509"]Non-Gay Seminarians
Gay Seminarians
Non-Gay Catholic Priests
Gay Catholic Priests[/update]
Non-Gay Other Religious Vocation
Gay Other Religious Vocation
Catholic SHoP Overlords (and one Catholic SHoP Overlady)
Non-Gay Devout Catholics
Gay Devout Catholics (Yes, it's possible)
Non-Gay Non-practicing Catholics
Gay Non-practicing Catholics
Non-Catholic SHoP Overlord
Non-Gay Non-Catholics
Gay Non-Catholics

Nevermind if their opinions and feelings are correct. This is the order in which the world's opinions should be considered. If Catholicism was a stupid democracy (and it isn't, check the posts in the recap atop this post), then votes should be weighted to reflect this graduation. [update time="1509"]Switched the seminarians and ordained priests around as already ordained priests don't need to worry about this.[/update]

And really, Non-Catholic votes would be weighted with a big, fat, fucking ZERO. Maybe even a negative one. But don't fucking tempt us.

So before you go spouting off to your Catholic friends, or in the Op-Ed section in the paper, or on your blog of rage with some more mind-vomit, make sure you know your place. If you need help determining just how far down the Priority Ladder you are, let us know! We'll be happy to help!

I don't complain about how the Degenerocratic Party is run. Because it ain't any of my business. Try to wrap your Little Brains around that one and take a hint.

Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

Wait a second...

Idiots in San Francisco ban all guns, yet they do this. Leave it to the LIbEral media to gloss over the obvious fact that a "gun ban", as SF recently passed, should obviate the need for bullet-proof vests...or are they really convinced that a gun ban in a single city would really work? Retards, all of them. Stupid is as LIbEral does.

funny link dumpage!

Before I forget: ha ha stanfurd!

Christmas Lights
Before this starts making all the linkdumps, maybe some of you will be able to say "I saw it on the SHoP first!"

Eye Direction and Lying

20 Things Every Assclown Must Do Before He Dies

and from the last link, this list of annoying baseball fans... Bane of the Ballpark

Life Comes at You Fast No, LMHBrent. Get your mind out of the Stanfurd.

Animated GIFs I like the one at the right. Like you needed to be told that. I think this'll see many SHoPpings...

Wow. Lotsa cool GIFs. Here's two more.


OK time for work now. The natives are restless.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Cry me a River you football-fumbling, interception-throwing PIG-EFFER

We're gonna lose Big Game. I can feel it.

excerpt from Cal starting Levy over Ayoob against Stanford Courtesy of MwHCock. U$C spelling correction mine.
Ayoob acknowledged his confidence is shot, and he hasn't dealt well with booing from Cal's fans at Memorial Stadium. His mechanics have suffered as well: After an incompletion against U$C, an exasperated Tedford pointed out a fundamental flaw in Ayoob's footwork on the sideline.

On a related note, those of you who picked the Under for the Big Game Spread all won (see also here). The spread as it was released this last sunday was Stanfurd +4.

Go Bears! Beat the Cardinul!

Jihad Jimmy
Commissioner, SHoP Department of Recreational Sport (Non-nude)

So much tard control to do, but so little time...

Saw this article on my yahoo! News headlines... Democratic hawk urges Iraq pullout and the best two quotes are placed right next to each other for conservative blogging convenience. A sign I should post about it, perhaps?

excerpt from Democratic hawk urges Iraq pullout

Murtha, a defense hawk, decorated Vietnam War veteran and retired Marine colonel, responded with a reference to the draft deferments that kept Cheney out of Vietnam. "I like guys who got five deferments and (have) never been there and send people to war, and then don't like to hear suggestions about what needs to be done," Murtha said. Senate Democratic leader Harry Reid of Nevada accused the White House of "a weak, spineless display of politics at a time of war" with its campaign against its Iraq-policy critics.

Hmmph. First off, Colonel Murtha, that's what politicians do on either side of the aisle. Left, Right, Republican, or Degenerocrat. I'm guessing you've never dealt with a highway construction project-- does that mean you should never vote for transportation legislation? (A good, general argument, btw. There's a little bit of Mark N in all of us.)

Second, Senator Reid, our "weak, spineless display of politics at a time of war" really is only in response to the Degener-ocrats strong, resolved, and tactless display of politics at a time of war. Did you even think about what you were saying before you said it? Do any of you degener-ocrats think anymore before opening your mouths?

doo dee doo... [cough]fucksegues![/cough]

It's Big Game, Citizen SHoPper Golden Bears!!! The latest dust-up from the flagship campus on our rugged eastern foothills is a doozy! I've been tracking it from the Cal Patriot, who is run by yet another filipino conservative blogger. Heh.

Some student is pissed that an advisor called her a racial epithet off-campus at the apartment complex in which they both live. Now the degenerate affirmative action groups on campus are citing this as a hostile environment to underrepresented minorities.

I'd like to point out that I and LMHBrent and the Cal Patriot all are "underrepresented minorities" as Filipinos. What a crock of Leftist shit. And stop printing ballots in Tagalog already. We can all read english better than a lot of native-born Americans.

Anycrap, rarely will I call a Jihad on something/somebody...

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PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

A practical application of guerilla Republicanism
Posse Up, Citizen SHoPpers

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 2:00 PM AND 3:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

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...but this time they're just asking for it. Go check out the Cal Patriot, or, because you're Lazy-Assed Citizen Temporary Associate Troll Engineer, just wait for me to post the relevant links for your convenience.

No, screw that! I'm not doing it this time! One of these days, Hillary's Thought Police are gonna come banging down my door, pull me off of a naked Keira Knightley, throw a coat on me and haul me away. And then how will you find these links?

I'm not posting the links. No way. Stop looking at me like that.

Aww shucks.

You know I can't say No to you guys...

On Racial Insults
Don't Give In
HateGate: Day 8 (Nice title, btw. Notice the "yay!"... is it a filipino thing, I wonder?)

BAMN-blog: http://uchostileclimate.blogspot.com/

What a shitty blog. And it spells out SHCUCS. How retarded. A little more thought could've yielded "Stop the Hostility-ness at the University of California Kovert Society" or something like that. Citizen SHoPpers, comment your suggestions below.

Anyway, that's not the Jihad I had in mind. Go troll this stupid BAMN blog. You wanna give these little shits a taste of the real world? You wanna introduce them to the unshielded politics of the non-Berkeley arena? Here's your chance.

Tell 'em Jihad Jimmy sent you.

I got us started... here's my comment before it likely gets removed..

my comment on this loser post
You Leftist Thought Policing Ignoramus. You definitely don't know a single thing about Free Speech. It starts with Free Thought. If somebody is unfortunate enough to get branded with your tag of "racist", that really is his/her own choice until the thought manifests itself in discriminatory action. Thank you for taking yet another step towards destroying my alma mater.

Fun stuff, huh?

Go Bears, Beat Fuck the Cardinul

Jihad Jimmy
Commissioner, SHoP Department of Recreational Sport (Non-nude)