More SHoP chat with Professor Shewseffi

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

The SHoP weighs in on Virginia Tech
I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret
You're on the air with KJIMMY
DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF
I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Take a shit on my Radio-Parade, why don't you...
BOYCOTT FREEFM 106.9 KIFR!!!
Back to the Basics...
Ya got two hours. No excuses this time.
A pukefest carousel for your ears!

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 11:00 AM AND 12:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

---

Ahh herro! More rov-ery chat with Orientarr Citizen SHoPper Professor Shewseffi. We were talking about some camcorder on sale online. I was asking advice. Not because he's Oriental and electronically inclined, but if that'll help you sleep better at night, go right ahead and think so...

Dude, i hate you. and debauchery. and deceitful charlatans.

ProfShewseffi (1:49:20 PM): get it! JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:49:30 PM): too late it's gone ProfShewseffi (1:50:11 PM): aw man ProfShewseffi (1:50:12 PM): you suck JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:50:29 PM): WTF you're the one who dragged your heels JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:50:37 PM): by the time you told me to buy it it was sold out ProfShewseffi (1:51:20 PM): fuck you cho seung hui! ProfShewseffi (1:51:27 PM): you had a million chances to buy it ProfShewseffi (1:51:32 PM): but you chose to spill my time ProfShewseffi (1:51:42 PM): your camera was not enough you snobs ProfShewseffi (1:51:57 PM): my time was not enough you punk JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:52:01 PM): Dude, i hate you. and debauchery. and deceitful charlatans. JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:52:24 PM): WTF KIND OF STUPID ORIENTAL USES THE PHRASE "DECEITFUL CHARLATANS?" JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:52:32 PM): except one that needs an ass-kicking? ProfShewseffi (1:53:45 PM): HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

It sucks that he ate his own 9mm before somebody could pistol whip some sense into this kid. I'm not jumping onto some bandwagon here, you'll notice. I would've recommended a pistol whipping even if he hadn't shot 32 debaucherous, deceitful charlatans.

looks like someone put some hallucinogen in his daily kimchee dosage that caused him to go bonkers

ProfShewseffi (1:53:47 PM): fucking orientals ProfShewseffi (1:53:54 PM): damn kim park hong su cho choi ProfShewseffi (1:54:13 PM): looks like someone put some hallucinogen in his daily kimchee dosage that caused him to go bonkers JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:54:39 PM): that crazy fucker ProfShewseffi (1:55:03 PM): hey in some sick twisted way ProfShewseffi (1:55:06 PM): he did asians a favor ProfShewseffi (1:55:08 PM): i mean ProfShewseffi (1:55:11 PM): i do not want ppl to die ProfShewseffi (1:55:36 PM): but he showed the world that asians arent just passive fuckers who do math all day JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:55:26 PM): LOL JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:55:28 PM): i guess so JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:55:34 PM): http://video.google.com/url?docid=-72185487...6kpxSPgg ProfShewseffi (1:55:49 PM): we are some crazy gun-toting republican motherfuckers compton style JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:55:45 PM): "we" as in orientals, or "we" as in you and me? ProfShewseffi (1:56:43 PM): orientals

The Professor brings up an interesting point. I've been tempted to play the "crazed, gun-toting, loner Oriental kid" card recently on some of these irritable Liberals who go through life racked with White Guilt here in the Blue State Frontier. God knows they're on edge nowadays because they let their tolerance get in the way of their common sense.

Or it could be that THE PURSWADER talks to me, the way that John London's switchblade Mr. Sticky talks to him on the show. And there, that's two more post labels to add.

Except that, shit, now I have to add the Jack Bauer recaps.

One more label: SANDRA BULLOCK'S NIPPY-NIPS

This next excerpt references the Mad TV clip linked above. Watch it, it's funny.

you sure it was him or some other oriental dude who looked like him?

JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:57:03 PM): FREEE-ZUH!!! L.A.P.D.-UH!!! ProfShewseffi (1:58:11 PM): AW SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO JihadJimmyMWCCDF (1:59:30 PM): see, these orientals are funny ProfShewseffi (1:59:56 PM): HAHAHAHAH bobby lee ProfShewseffi (1:59:59 PM): he did one before ProfShewseffi (2:00:01 PM): another 24 ProfShewseffi (2:00:25 PM): hahahahahhah ProfShewseffi (2:01:49 PM): HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! ProfShewseffi (2:03:45 PM): did you know that john cho went to Cal? JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:03:38 PM): no shit! ProfShewseffi (2:03:56 PM): yeah ProfShewseffi (2:04:05 PM): he graduated in 99? 2000? ProfShewseffi (2:04:09 PM): i saw him on campus a few times ProfShewseffi (2:04:12 PM): before he got famous JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:04:13 PM): you sure it was him or some other oriental dude who looked like him? ProfShewseffi (2:04:35 PM): yeah it was him JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:04:38 PM): OK i was being sarcastic ProfShewseffi (2:04:58 PM): hhahhaha ProfShewseffi (2:04:59 PM): i know JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:06:08 PM): LOL check this out JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:06:21 PM): i searched for "john cho wikipedia" JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:06:21 PM): http://www.blingo.com/search?q=john+cho+wikipedia&sourceid=firefox&s=0&s=0 JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:06:26 PM): look what the second result is JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:06:41 PM): LOL oh shit, john cho was an english major! ProfShewseffi (2:07:19 PM): they all are ProfShewseffi (2:07:21 PM): damn koreans ProfShewseffi (2:11:07 PM): ya know... in light of all of this convo ProfShewseffi (2:11:18 PM): we are justified to make racist comments against orientals ProfShewseffi (2:11:25 PM): because i, too, am an oriental JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:11:15 PM): oh yes as am i

If I can get Professor Shewseffi to embrace Oriental as the preferred nomenclature, I'll have made great inroads on my latest project in political incorrectness.

we're the mexicans of the orient

JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:12:38 PM): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Model_minority JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:14:33 PM): whoa sweet, us lazy filipinos aren't considered a "model minority" ProfShewseffi (2:15:22 PM): you guys are considered the mah-dur puckers ProfShewseffi (2:15:30 PM): in your balik bayan boxes JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:15:22 PM): we're the mexicans of the orient ProfShewseffi (2:16:27 PM): that's right ProfShewseffi (2:16:39 PM): and anything below the region of hong kong ProfShewseffi (2:16:48 PM): they are the skidmarks on the underpants of asia

Mexicans of the Pacific Rim, Uncle Toms of the Pacific Rim. Pick 'em, I gots racial invectives galore!

Not that "Mexican" is a racial invective. It just has those connotations. Ask the Daily Californian. They edited one of my letters to the editor which referred to my Mexican friend who was running for some stupid political office for some stupid student government. She was Mexican, I've met her parents. But no, the Daily Cal had to change Mexican to Hispanic.

Not sure when or how perfectly good words like "Mexican" or "Jew" became politically incorrect. But now that they are, I'm more inclined to use them. Heh.

i knew that conversation looked familiar

ProfShewseffi (2:19:08 PM): sometimes i think that we have the funniest conversations ProfShewseffi (2:19:08 PM): hahahahaha ProfShewseffi (2:19:11 PM): very noteworthy ProfShewseffi (2:19:15 PM): and worth saving JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:19:05 PM): that's why i put them up on the SHoP ProfShewseffi (2:19:27 PM): HAHAHAH JihadJimmyMWCCDF (2:25:14 PM): did you see the last time you made the SHoP? ProfShewseffi (2:25:47 PM): yeah i did ProfShewseffi (2:25:48 PM): just saw it ProfShewseffi (2:25:49 PM): ahhahahaah ProfShewseffi (2:25:51 PM): the OC ProfShewseffi (2:25:53 PM): ahahhahahaha!!! ProfShewseffi (2:25:55 PM): and our convo ProfShewseffi (2:26:02 PM): i knew that conversation looked familiar

Maybe if i'm not too lazy, I'll post up some more permalinks to Professor Shewseffi's earlier SHoP appearances.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

A pukefest carousel for your ears!

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret
You're on the air with KJIMMY
DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF
I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Take a shit on my Radio-Parade, why don't you...
BOYCOTT FREEFM 106.9 KIFR!!!
Back to the Basics...
Ya got two hours. No excuses this time.

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 4:00 PM AND 6:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

---

If you know your Tio Jaime, you'll know that he's a budding radiophile. See the recap posts above.

My radio schedule is now:

1) John London's Inferno podcasts from two months ago on the drive in to work.
2) Don and Mike on my lunch break.
3) John London's Inferno live in the truck now that they're back on the air in the SF Bay Area
4) More John London's Inferno podcasts once the live show is done.

This is just fine, except for the live Inferno show. Recently, they've been playing the stupidest commercial for the The Search Dog Foundation. I've found the recording of this pukefest of a commercial.

If your ears start to bleed at the end of the commercial, I apologize.

Gimme a fucking break. You were all crying? STFU before we send you to Chinatown as food.

God what a shitty commercial. It's almost as shitty as the Netflix radio commercials. I tried figuring those out, until I realized they were a huge pile of horseshit.

And no, retards, Netflix won't save you any money on gas, unless you're stupid enough to make a trip to the video store and the video store alone. Smart people hit up the video store on the way home from work. And holy sheep shit, see? You didn't waste any gas.

Radio commercials seem to be worse than TV commercials, if only because you can mute TV commercials and still see when to take the mute off. You do that on radio? Well then you're sitting there in your car listening to your own Little Brain thought wondering just exactly what the impeachable offense is.

I thank God that those useless Geico commercials are finally said and done. You know the ones where somebody saves a lot of money on car insurance by switching to Geico? Yeah, they were funny the first time. Not so funny the thirtieth time. And the new ones using various celebrities were also funny the first few times. Now, they're irritating.

Post your own in the comments. Bonus SHoPbucks to you if you post audio links too...

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Ya got two hours. No excuses this time.

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret
You're on the air with KJIMMY
DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF
I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Take a shit on my Radio-Parade, why don't you...
BOYCOTT FREEFM 106.9 KIFR!!!
Back to the Basics...

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 2:00 PM AND 3:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

---

We're under two hours away from the Second Coming of John London's Inferno. I'm streaming a station from Pennsylvania right now, listening to D&M waiting for 4pm PDT to roll around.

Go check out these two sites, the first is the official site, the second is the forum set up back in April when this whole C-fuck began.

John London's Inferno (official site)
John London's Inferno - A Fansite for John London's Inferno

I'm on the forums. Sometimes making useful contributions, other times not. Thus is the nature of your Favorite SHoP Overlord. Go read some of the Tio Jaime posts up in the recap above (by jack bauer) for some more background info.

How about i fucking tell you how to listen to the stream? Go to the forums (the second link, the fansite) and find it there. The official site is somewhat convoluted, I think... Anyway, check it out, you'll like it. And practice the radio rebus, so i can kick your asses.

In other budding radio-phile news, I listened to Opie and Anthony this morning. Was nothing to write home about.

Tio Jaime

How wonderful it must be for you never to have to listen to the men around you who are much smarter than you are.

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

"It's just gonna be another one of those days..."

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 8:00 PM AND 10:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

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two wild and crazy civil engineers
9:06:55 PM TioJ: you know how when I watch my DVDs of The Shield, I wanna join the LAPD? 9:07:00 PM TioJ: i wanna join CTU now. 9:07:36 PM ProfShewseffi: hahaha

In hindsight, maybe my radiophilia explains my fondness for NewsRadio. Any coincidence that this engineer's favorite TV show growing up was MacGyver? And if you were ever curious, Heather Locklear in TJ Hooker is why I have a thing for women in uniform nowadays.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3amC of 24 (Season 3), episode 2

You are now in chat room "BiteMeAIM." JihadJimmy858 has entered the chat room. JihadJimmy858 (8:21:07 PM): hello dere JihadJimmy858 (8:21:20 PM): OK so i even forgot how to set up these chats JihadJimmy858 (8:21:38 PM): next episode of 24... ooh, deleted scenes and alternate takes! JihadJimmy858 (8:22:01 PM): and now... a 3am Criticism of 24, Season 3! JihadJimmy858 (8:22:07 PM): here we go... JihadJimmy858 (8:22:25 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24 JihadJimmy858 (8:22:32 PM): COUNTER TERRORIST UNIT!!! JihadJimmy858 (8:22:55 PM): HECTOR SALAZAR! JihadJimmy858 (8:23:07 PM): KYLE SINGER!!! JihadJimmy858 (8:23:16 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER! JihadJimmy858 (8:23:24 PM): KIM BAUER! JihadJimmy858 (8:23:35 PM): JACK BAUER!!! JihadJimmy858 (8:23:40 PM): (it's about fucking time) JihadJimmy858 (8:24:04 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 2:00 PM AND 3:00 PM JihadJimmy858 (8:24:16 PM): (so... do events occur in real time?) JihadJimmy858 (8:30:25 PM): you clueless whore... "Because it's not a big deal?" yay! Stupid Kim Time! Let's not listen to the men in your life *AGAIN* JihadJimmy858 (8:32:11 PM): OK. WHORE CITY JihadJimmy858 (8:32:22 PM): WTF did your stupid shit boyfriend just tell you? JihadJimmy858 (8:32:55 PM): How wonderful it must be for you never to have to listen to the men around you who are much smarter than you are. JihadJimmy858 (8:33:05 PM): But no, you're a goddam computer genius. I forgot. JihadJimmy858 (8:35:00 PM): ooh yeah bikini chicks JihadJimmy858 (8:35:24 PM): 02:13:05 JihadJimmy858 (8:35:29 PM): ooh, a deleted scene JihadJimmy858 (8:35:34 PM): 02:17:36 JihadJimmy858 (8:42:37 PM): 02:24:39 JihadJimmy858 (8:44:15 PM): 02:26:17 JihadJimmy858 (8:44:22 PM): 02:30:43 JihadJimmy858 (8:48:54 PM): Las Nieves, Northern Mexico JihadJimmy858 (8:50:39 PM): they could've chosen a hotter mexi-chick. she's kinda ugly. JihadJimmy858 (8:51:37 PM): "Umm, OK, you don't have to yell..." JihadJimmy858 (8:51:47 PM): stupid chloe. everybody whispers in 24 JihadJimmy858 (8:52:30 PM): 02:38:50 JihadJimmy858 (8:52:34 PM): 02:43:16 JihadJimmy858 (8:53:28 PM): ooh a deleted scene JihadJimmy858 (8:53:49 PM): h aha, he got pistol whipped in the face JihadJimmy858 (8:53:52 PM): ooh, a shotgun JihadJimmy858 (8:54:00 PM): FUCK YOU DRUG DEALER JihadJimmy858 (8:54:59 PM): how did jack miss him? JihadJimmy858 (8:55:03 PM): Shut up, Stupid! JihadJimmy858 (8:55:34 PM): LOL JihadJimmy858 (8:55:43 PM): Chase stepped on the dude's GSW JihadJimmy858 (8:56:05 PM): whoa, ten grand to move a bag of coke JihadJimmy858 (8:56:09 PM): Kyle, Kyle Singer! JihadJimmy858 (8:56:16 PM): 02:46:50 JihadJimmy858 (8:56:18 PM): and a deleted scene JihadJimmy858 (8:57:12 PM): ooh yeah bikini chick going through Kyle's shit JihadJimmy858 (8:58:18 PM): 02:48:55 JihadJimmy858 (8:58:23 PM): 02:53:22 JihadJimmy858 (8:58:35 PM): oh hi bikini chick JihadJimmy858 (9:03:10 PM): 02:58:05 JihadJimmy858 (9:03:47 PM): Ooh the Race Card a/o the Girlfriend Card? JihadJimmy858 (9:05:00 PM): Ooh, it's a CTU mole! JihadJimmy858 (9:05:19 PM): and only in the second episode JihadJimmy858 (9:05:37 PM): 03:00:00 JihadJimmy858 has left the chat room.

SixHertz House of Not-Much-Going-On...

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 8:00 PM AND 9:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

---

Incidentally, the black chick on the show did have $1,000,000 in her case, but she sold it for $215,000. Ha ha.

disappointing Tio Jaime again
8:45:12 PM TioJaime: watching Deal or No Deal right now 8:45:39 PM TioJaime: is it wrong to want to see somebody shoot herself in the face on national TV if she loses $1,000,000? 8:46:59 PM TioJaime: oh she's not shooting herself in the face =(

Don't think I posted these yet...

Maybe you should go back to stickers. The challenge is gone.

I took these magnets off of Leftist cars here in lovely San Francisco-Oakland-Berkeley. They fucking deserved it.

Those were from a few weeks ago, but I was just too lazy to put 'em up in time. Here's one more from tonight...

took this one when the Blue State fuck-up wasn't even 10 yards away from his car

Although it is smarter for these Leftists not to permanently Stupidize their vehicles, this makes Guerilla Republicaning all the easier.

But don't take my word for it. Check it out and see for yourself!

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Back to the Basics...

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret
You're on the air with KJIMMY
DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF
I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Take a shit on my Radio-Parade, why don't you...
BOYCOTT FREEFM 106.9 KIFR!!!

THE FOLLOWING CRAPFEST TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 3:00 PM AND 7:00 PM ON 106.9 FREEFM.

SHITTY RADIO PROGRAMMING OCCURS IN REAL TIME, COURTESY KEN KOHL.

---

In the whole spectrum of refugee John London Infernans, I think I was on the edge of the generous side. I listened on and off to johnny wank-all for the past two days, giving him every opportunity to step into the large void that is 106.9 KIFR.

He crashed and burned. Over the past two days, he's talked about the following:

Barry Bonds
Cyber-sex and cyber-cheating
myspace
Rock Lobster
Fetishes

Wow! Does the post-London radio pukefest never end??? I've gone the extra mile and given him the two days that most of you wouldn't give him, and holy shit, he has taken absolutely no steps towards winning an already disgruntled audience.

What part of disgruntled audience is hard to understand? Think about it, KIFR management... you take away a popular host only to replace him with some off-the-shelf jagoff who is an obvious LA transplant ("the 101" and "the 580"? Gimme a fucking break. I'm just waiting for him to mangle the name of some Bay Area city) but don't give him explicit instructions to endear the audience? Christ, at least give him the clue that he's landing in a hot LZ and that the natives are restless.

How many of us refugee Infernans could you have salvaged had you instructed Johnny Wank-all to start off by saying-- even before introducing himself, "Penn Jillette is a disgrace to radio and to Infinity Broadcasting."

Whatever. You ain't gonna listen. You jagoffs probably can't even tell me who Don Geronimo and Mike O'Meara are. You're a pitiful excuse for a radio station and it shows from 3-7 pm on our once beloved 106.9 FreeFM.

Refugee Infernans: Continue to boycott the station! Don't even listen to gather his shitty show topics-- it ain't worth it. As for the rest of the "lineup", they're worthless as well. As a Tom Leykis listener from 2002-2004, trust your Tio Jaime when he tells you that Tom Leykis gets predictable after two months-- and his "Ask the Atheist" segments are even more annoying than Penn Jillette's atheism bits. If you're still listening after a few months, you need to work on your memory retention skills.

Don't even get me started on Adam Carolla. His show took a shit on itself in the first week when they started singing those retarded songs to introduce the crew. What a craptacular show.

Kinda scary that the shining star of FreeFM is Turi Ryder, huh? Shit, she has her own fucking station! How nice it must be to be her right now...

Again, Infernans, check out The Don and Mike Show from 12-4 Pacific. You can catch the stream from 106.7 WJFK or on the actual radio on 1140 KHTK out of Sacramento (from my own experience, reception is kinda shitty around 280/101 in San Jose, and also around 280/Saratoga around the old Zautica strip club).

Don and Mike run a quality show, and they don't screen their phonecalls sometimes which leads to some pretty funny segments with their callers. Oh, and are they doing some shitty segment right now about weird fetishes? No. They're interviewing Bob FUCKING Barker.

Other than that? Check back here for comments from your fellow Infernans. Also check out Brad Kava's blog and the myspace page. Lotsa info there, lotsa former KIFR listeners like yourself.

Tio Jaime (aka Jimmy from Oakland)

<update time="1502">
Yes, as a matter of fact, you are missing some good shit on D&M right now. Just one line for you, and if it doesn't sound Infernal, I don't know what does...

"And so they fixed it. And now the man makes more than the woman."
(followed by maniacal laughter)

What were they talking about? I don't know, and does it really matter at this point? It's a funny line and there are plenty more just like it if you follow the links above.
</update>

<update time="1517">
Well, at least it's good to know that FreeFMs around the nation are taking huge shits on themselves...

Van Ailin': Roth's Radio Show Struggling

And for fuck's sake, what's up with the Adam Carolla pic on the KIFR page? He looks like a goddam retard.
</update>

<update time="1656">
Infernans: Found this comment at the Brad Kava blog...

Comment from Hans
John will be appearing on Hannity and Combs tomorrow night (Thursday, April 13) to discuss the situation. 6 pm, Pacific, Fox News Channel. Please tell everyone you know to tune in.

We need more guerilla tactics, too... anybody want to volunteer to spray-paint "LONDON LIVES" on the Banana Republic billboard on Broadway/Battery? That would send a pretty powerful message. I'll buy you a beer and a lapdance at Showgirls, just up the street... Provide proof to claim your prizes.
</update>

<update time="1659">
Well Eff me in the Ay. Hans already commented the exact same thing here in the SHoP. Nice job, Tio Jaime.
</update>

BOYCOTT FREEFM 106.9 KIFR!!!

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret
You're on the air with KJIMMY
DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF
I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Take a shit on my Radio-Parade, why don't you...

THE FOLLOWING CRAPFEST TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 3:00 PM AND 7:00 PM ON 106.9 FREEFM.

SHITTY RADIO PROGRAMMING OCCURS IN REAL TIME, COURTESY KEN KOHL.

---

Who in the FUCK is Johnny Wendell???

If you're here because you found the SHoP by searching for "John London" please to be reading the post, update, and comments here.

Tio Jaime (aka Jimmy from Oakland)

Take a shit on my Radio-Parade, why don't you...

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP...

I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE
Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret
You're on the air with KJIMMY
DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF
I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE

THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 5:00 PM AND 6:00 PM.

EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME.

---

Citizen SHoPpers, your Tio Jaime is gonna take a hack at this "An Open Letter to..." thing we see all over the place. Wish me luck.

Well tie me up and attach electrodes to my genitals. You dumb pigfuckers finally did it. What I thought was an ordinary "Best of" segment last Fri-dee was actually the first evening drive without John London, Dennis Cruz, and Chris Townsend on KIFR 106.9 FreeFM. As such, it was my last time listening to KIFR.

Nevermind that you just fired Darian O'Toole.

Nevermind that Turi Ryder, her replacement, ain't nothing to write home about.

Nevermind that your lineup of Adam Carolla, Penn Jillette, and Tom Leykis has the exact opposite intended effect you had hoped to have on radiophiles.

This is the last straw. WTF, did you fire him for calling into question the obvious shittiness of Adam Carolla and Penn Jillette? The people you're firing thus far have had extensive radio experience. Instead, you're running with a bunch of stand-up comedians with shitty shows.

And Tom Leykis, while he has plenty of radio experience and runs a decent show-- for all of you Bay Aryans out there who have been hearing Tom for the past few months now, just know that after listening to his show for six months, any listener with half a brain will be able to guess exactly what he's going to say in response to whichever of the three or four types of callers he has to his show. It's an unoriginal show which relies on the same stupid gimmicks and same stupid callers time and time again. If you're still entertained by the show after six months, then you have the attention span of the average high school cheerleader.

KIFR Program Director Ken Kohl and all you other pigfuckers: you've gutted your golden goose. When you could've stocked the bay area airwaves with local talent with more ability than the Sarah and No Name Show (#1: not that that's hard to do, and #2: get off my back i love that show and listen to it each morning), instead you're relying on the canned CBS bullshit from Los Angeles, Las Vegas, and Los Angeles again. Nice job.

You want a quick and easy solution? Start piping in the syndicated show from Washington, DC: The Don and Mike Show.

I'm sick of this shit. I'm gonna play on the xb0x0r.

Anybody who finds this post (either because you searched for "John London fired" or because you followed a link from a comment I left somewhere) and has any info on John London et. al., please leave it in the comments. Links to news stories are OK, just so long as they're time-relevant. See the comments in the posts in the recaps if you're confused.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

<update date="20060410" time="1555">
Sorry, I was in a meeting, so I didn't get to catch this crap as it came on at 3pm.

Who the fuck is this tool? Fuck, it's not even Jim Rome tape-delayed!

Oh, of course you should talk about Barry Bonds in San Francisco. Fucking rookies, all of you choadstains at FreeFM. Get a clue, Ken Kohl. Nice job, you rejects. I'm making my way back to KSFO.

Fellow Infernans: Boycott KIFR 106.9 FreeFM! At 12 noon, point your browser to WJFK and catch the internet stream of a quality FreeFM show-- the tried and true Don and Mike Show! Don't worry about the FreeFM "format", as these guys were turning crap into radio gold long before this FreeFM shit came about. 12-4 Pacific time, streaming online or tune into 1140AM KHTK. If you liked the John London Not-Just-Sports Show or John London's Inferno, you'll love Don and Mike.

If you don't, I'll buy you a tin of Bobo's Scrotum Polish.
</update>

<update date="20060410" time="1630">
And now this fucking tool is talking about Rock Lobster? Wow. What a show. At least it provides for some good, snark-o-licious blogging when I should be doing work. Ass.

Just got an e-mail from the admin of Bay Area Radio Digest. I initially asked him if he had any inside information on John London being fired. He asked if I had heard anything as he was unable to tune in this last week.

Excerpt from Tio Jaime's e-mail to BayRadioDJ
On thursday, they had a segment where Erica the phone screener at one point said "take a dump on his chest". Could management have reacted to that? Jimmy

I got this response a few minutes ago...

BayRadioDJ's e-mail to Tio Jaime
Jimmy, I just received a message that said London mentioned on Thursday that he'd pay $5000 if someone would kill Penn Jillette -- $7000 if it was a painful death. That might have upset management, too. D.J.

And I'm sure all of you out there in Radioland were thinking what I wrote back...

Tio Jaime's response to BayRadioDJ
That's funnier than anything i've ever heard come outof Penn Jillette's show... Jimmy

More news as it comes in. Fuck FreeFM.
</update>

<update date="20060410" time="1651">
If you found the SHoP whilst looking for news on John London being fired, you've likely already seen this post on Bay Area Radio Digest, although I'm having trouble accessing it from the main page...

London Latest To Leave Free FM

OK, and caveat Citizen SHoPpers. Despite my rantings and ravings, and despite your feeling betrayed, and even despite my calling KIFR management "pigfuckers"-- it hasn't been confirmed that John London was in fact fired. He may have quit. Although this doesn't seem likely in my opinion given that they were talking up the Friday Cocktail Hour on Thursday's show.

For all of the SHoP's griping at the irresponsibility of the media, best that we practice what we preach.
</update>

<update date="20060410" time="1903">
Fellow Infernans: OK, I did the Right Thing and gave this Johnny Wendell a try.

<bottomline>
Even if he wasn't replacing the Inferno, he would still suck major balls.
</bottomline>

And he's just chock-full of originality! He spent most of the time talking about whether or not cyber-relationships were cheating? Holy shit, that's like a 20-minute topic, at best! Where the fuck did they find this moron?

Oh. Los Angeles. Well, that explains a bit, doesn't it? Holy Jesus, this guy makes Turi Ryder listenable.

I'm goddam astounded. You'd think that 2+ hours on internet-cheating would be a good topic of discussion since we're an hour's fucking drive north of Silicon Valley? An hour-and-a-half if you take 880? Oh yes, it would've been a mindnumbingly good topic FIVE FUCKING YEARS AGO.

Citizen SHoPpers and refugee Infernans: check out the comments below, as you'll find others in the same boat as yourself-- confused, hurt, disappointed, but most of all pissed. And we have the right to be. Even more so when we're able to confirm that the Inferno crew was fired for nothing more than the shittiest reasons that Infinity Broadcasting could possibly pull out of Ken Kohl's ass.

Oh look, we have our first troll! Welcome, you anonymous degenerate pigfucker!

Special thanks to Paul who has painstakingly taken time out of his life to save the podcasts. Check out the comments.

Hopefully John, Dennis, Chris, or Larry or Phone Bitch Erica or webmistress Mindy will find us here and fill us in a little bit. I'm sure they're eager to let their loyal fans know what's the dealie-o.

As for myself? You can read my older posts about John London's Inferno if you scroll up to the top of this post and find the 24-style recap. Just look for Jack Bauer. Also, if you check out the podcasts which Paul has fished out of the FreeFM toilet, find the one which talks about the most challenging Radio Rebus ever! (it's located about 6-7 minutes from the end).

Jimmy from Oakland
</update>

<update date="20060410" time="2249">
Last update before I get to bed. I'm getting sick and as want to turn in before 11. You got that MySpace internet(s) crack? Yeah, I caved in a few weeks back and got it too... I just received a message from this dude right here, who likely found me through Darian O'Toole's myspace page.

http://www.myspace.com/jlinferno

See? It was only a matter of time before groups of survivors got in touch with each other.
</update>

<update date="20060411" time="0723">
Again, you may have already read this. But maybe not. I'll fix the near-invisible, broken link on the wikipedia page when I get to work. Hell, I'll even post an excerpt here later. But for now...

Radio talk show host John London fired

Penn Jillette is a pigfucker of embarassing proportion. FreeFM should've shitcanned his ass after the first week. Carolla too.
</update>

<update date="20060411" time="0830">
I should've known that Brad Kava would have information on this. My apologies in getting this to you in such an untimely manner.

TWO STRIKES ON FREE FM: JOHN LONDON FIRED

Heh, check out the comments! Some other Don and Mike fan got the drop on your Tio Jaime!
</update>

<update date="20060414" time="0059">
Greetings, Citizen SHoPpers and Refugee Infernans!

You've likely found this page because you were looking for John London's Inferno from 3-7 on 106.9 FreeFM. Much to your dismay, you found that he had been replaced with some Los Angeleno jag0ff who I have christened Johnny Wank-all.

Feel free to use that until something better comes along.

You may be here from wikipedia's John London page, one of the other gathering spots for us refugee Infernans, oh fuck my shit even google! Google's returning the SHoP when you put in "John London" fired.

Anycrap, I think I've reached the limit of updating this initial post. News is trickling in, and it can be given its own post up at the top. A few more days and this here post won't even show up on the front page of the SHoP. Will our slower Infernan brethren have common sense enough to find the latest? I sure as fuck hope so.

As usual, the wonderful blog admin SixHertz has been remiss at greeting the Infernalanche which has befallen the SHoP. So I'll have to recycle the last one we used when we had a traffic spike. You can see it up towards the top...

What is the House of Pain?

We're a political blog normally. Sometimes-- as you've seen this past week-- I go off on other apolitical tangents. Our Leftist trolls don't even notice, much to our amusement. Amusement which slowly degenerates into pity.

So yeah. No more updates to this post. Here's the front page: SixHertz House of Pain
</update>

I AM STILL A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP... I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret You're on the air with KJIMMY DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 7:00 PM AND 8:00 PM. EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME. Damn, I'm good. 7:12 PM TioJaime: http://johnlondon1069freefm.blogspot.com/2006/03/monday-march-13.html TioJaime: very last line MwHCock: what were you guessing? TioJaime: radio rebus TioJaime: they play a series of sounds, and it decodes to a person, place or thing I'd like to point out that I am not a prize pig. And even if I were, I wouldn't be stupid enough to say it on the air. Oh no. The gloat-age is best saved for the privacy of one's own blog. Nevermind that there's a bit of skill involved in winning the Radio Rebus, so any gloating is well earned. Also Nevermind that tonight was my second time. Ooh, momma. And an even bigger Nevermind that none of you Citizen SHoPpers followed through with my advice and started catching the internet stream of John London's Inferno like I told you to. Oh no. Enough gloat-age and indignance. On to more San Francisco Bay Area radio news. I've come across the airchecks from Darian O'Toole's last day on KIFR. They're pretty embarassing. I mean sure, we all make mistakes and we all screw up-- but this is inexcusable. Don't they have PDs or any kind of management there who would've pulled the plug on her show and run Best-Ofs? No great loss. Don and Mike have plenty of archived podcasts online to fill the mid-morning slot on KJIMMY. Heh, gotcha. Thought I was gonna go through this post w/o mentioning D&M, huh? OK. New show on right now, recommended by Trosama min Asi-- Deal or No Deal. Cute chicks with briefcases. Ooh, hi chick #10. Ooh, hi chick #20! #5! Cute hair. #22! Donna! She was cute... Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith PS- Holy shit, these DoND chicks are freakin' HAWT

DRY MOIST HUMP LOAF

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP... I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret You're on the air with KJIMMY THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 10:00 AM AND 11:00 AM. EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME. OK so it looks like Darian O'Toole has been fired? This is uncool, as I had my thirteen-and-a-half hour radio lineup working just the way I liked it. And now with-- <news classification=breaking> There's an HTML colorname "DodgerBlue"? That's the gayest thing since Gay came to Gayville. Enjoy the LawnGreen, which is the closest to Emerald I could find. Heh. And fuck you, Brokeback Mount-me. HOLY SHIT Ok was googling blingo-ing "Turi Ryder" who was filling in last week and who this week isn't even mentioning that Darian will be back. She said something inflammatory about terrorists back in 1997 or so, and eventually found her way over to 710 KIRO in lovely Seattle. Unimportant. I was at the KIRO page looking for more information, and instead found the following!!! Better than Sarah and No Name. Better than John London's Inferno. Better than DON AND FREAKING MIKE. Four words, and if you can understand them, I'll buy you a lapdance from one of Tio Jaime's favorite strippers. Dry. Moist. Hump. Loaf. Well, if the termination of Darian O'Toole can result in Jihad Jimmy being reunited with the Ron and Don Show, already I will have come out ahead. </news> OK. Darian's replacement keeps blathering on about the Oscars. And I don't give a flying fuck. If you got to this page either through googling, blingo-ing, or technorati-ing "Darian O'Toole", or even by clicking on one of my comments on a blog somewhere, hello and greetings. I'm just as scared and confused as you are. If you have any news, please use my corner of the SHoP to disseminate the news here. Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith <update time=1754> Found this post on Bay Area Radio Digest. It's gossip, just keep that in mind... Darian's blog here... more to follow as I find it. TJ </update>

You're on the air with KJIMMY

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP... I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 10:00 PM AND 11:00 PM. EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME. K-J-I, M-M-Y. Your Red State Outpost in the Blue State Frontier. Won tickets this morning to see Kevin Nealon at Cobb's on the Sarah and No Name Show on KLLC. It was Super-Game Thursday today, and instead of choosing the easy win with the Game-Game, I asked for Sarah's never-popular Radio Terminology Game. Correctly answered a multiple choice about the definition of "Liners" and was rewarded with tickets to Kevin Nealon under my name at Will Call. The coolest part about it? I got to talk to Sarah herself! Man oh man, do I wanna nail her. A or B, Citizen SHoPpers... Sarah or Darian O'Toole? <game name="A or B"> A or B? And yes, it is hard to find a picture of Sarah w/o No Name. Do what I did. Don't imagine No Name being there. Trust me. </game> And oh, how Christmas morning gets even better... they played my submission for bumper music on John London's Inferno today! They're looking for suggestions for bumper music to be claimed in an exclusivity draft opposite Darian O'Toole. I sent them-- partly in jest-- an mp3 of the instrumental intro of Joe Jackson's "Steppin' Out". Pretty cool, man... I stretched a 12 second phrase into a couple of minutes. Find the song. Listen to it. Realize that it has no place in modern FM talk radio bringing you back from a stop set. Cool thing though, Dennis Cruz still played it on the air. "Tio Jaime sent this in to us..." I was pretty stoked. Chris Townsend said it wasn't exactly 2006. And he's absolutely right. John London said it was still a good song and he wanted it on a button. Dude! This is my foot in the door! I've never been on anybody's cart machine before! That's assuming they still use cart machines! Tio Jaime

Eastmost Peninsula is the Secret

PREVIOUSLY ON THE SHoP... I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 10:00 AM AND 11:00 AM. EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME. Found a secret page on KNBR's website. This is akin to finding Easter eggs in your favorite video game. Although in that light, maybe the post title doesn't quite fit. Nonetheless, you're cool if you can recognize it... John London's Not Just Sports Show: Ten Hall of Fame The concept is simple enough, and new listeners on KIFR may have caught wind of the boys discussing this a few weeks back. You know what, just go check it out because it's a lot easier than your Tio Jaime explaining it to you. Anycrap, back to the Ten Hall of Fame. What was once the Not Just Sports Show is now John London's Inferno. They have a new Museum of Tens and they want to expand it to include some of the older wings. I myself am partial towards the She-Biscuit wing for horse-faced women. So check out the Ten Hall of Fame before KNBR finds out and shuts it down. Oh, and they're streaming my new morning show! Check out Sarah and No Name on KLLC! 97.3 FM if you're in the area and have a functioning radio, or the internet stream. 5:30 to 10 California time. So for those of you who are curious and hopefully even curious enough to point your browser to my radio shows of choice (this means maybe LMHBrent)... Tio Jaime's radio line-up, now available online! Time Show 5:30am - 10:00am 10:00am - 12:00pm 12:00pm - 3:00pm 3:00pm - 7:00pm Sarah and No Name Darian O'Toole Don and Mike John London Thirteen-and-a-half hours of FM talk. That's a lot of radio. About ten years ago that would've been Lee Rogers and Melanie Morgan, then Rush Limbaugh, and then a big break until Mike Savage. Nowadays? No politics. Maybe right before elections and right after elections. If you scrutinize my daily line-up, you'll notice two things. First, no Adam Corolla. I gave his show a week, and it took a major shit. Stand-up comedy doesn't really have a place on the radio. Reality radio does a lot better. Like Don and Mike. And John London. And Sarah and No Name, to a certain extent. Last, and more importantly, you'll see that I've pre-empted the last hour of D&M for John London. Oh yes. It's true. Lucky for me, the last hour of D&M is pretty much just News and Comments with Buzz Burbank. But still, for your Tio Jaime to pre-empt Don and Mike? It's probably indicative of a good show which he's wholly recommending and yet you neglect to listen. Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

I AM A BADASS BUDDING RADIOPHILE

OK. All of you naysayers who mocked my budding radio-philia? I just won the Radio Rebus on John London's Inferno, motherfuckers!!!

It was the second Radio Rebus I'd heard since they were taken off the air at KNBR waaaay back when when I was still a construction engineer driving down to the job in Santa Clara. The first one they did this morning was "Wisconsin".

For the second Radio Rebus on Free FM 106.9 KIFR, I successfully decoded "Sacramento" and won a bottle of this...

BoBo's Scrotum Polish at the Folsom Street Fair
Click to enlarge in new window

Thank you, John London, for making me the happiest engineer on the island!

Their producer got my name and address off the air, and asked which flavor of polish I wanted. "Oh shoot. I hadn't thought that far ahead. Is there an original flavor?" She chuckled. There really was and they'll be sending it to me soon at Fort Tio Jaime in the Red State Outpost in the Blue America frontier.

And then I looked up "scrotum polish" on blingo. And then I found the pic above. And then I found the BoBo's URL. And then I realized the SHoP gold I had in my hands.

And here we are. Welcome, Citizen SHoPper!

How appropriate that it was The Sac which won me scrotum polish... I wonder if they planned it that way?

I came close to winning Don and Mike's Phonescan once. Won tickets to Great America from KEZR while on the santa clara job...

Now that I've been sufficiently transformed from a field engineer to an office engineer, you'd think that this would wreak havoc on my budding radio-philia. Alas no, as Don and Mike have been streaming for a while now and I can also catch Darian O'Toole and John London from the safety of my desk.

And in the event that I'm out in the field for inspections or site visits or trips to Dublin Hooters, KHTK and KIFR each have the honorary right button on my AM and FM presets, respectively.

Please take note Citizen SHoPpers, check out 106.9! If you like the SHoP, you'll love O'Toole and especially London...

Tio Jaime